CC has been blamed,
MP, DD and GA,
But maybe the network
Couldn't afford union pay...
Ruthless, they killed you,
Without thought of the fans,
And despite all resistance,
Went ahead with their plans.
-==--==--==--==--==-
Scully got you from Clyde
While working on a case.
You were one hungry dog
'Till you ate your owner's face.
Scully'd give you a bath
In her white kitchen sink,
But Mulder, with wrath,
Would still insist that you stink.
You were a nameless SYD.
Some people called you Clyde.
We learned your name--but comedy!
In that same episode you died!
Your time here was short,
And your legs shorter still.
But none of that matters
To your fans here in X-Ville.
How could life be so cruel?
What a meaningless fate-
Our beloved Queequeg,
Reduced to gator bait.
...Where no one trusted no one
(They wished to be FBI as profession)
Came the rockus sound of bagpipes
From a gigantic wedding procession!
XVXVXVXVXVXV
There's a wedding here in X-Ville.
Everyone's expected to come.
The town will all be wasted
and have a few weeks of fun.
Allisona's the main bride here
With green leather in her grin.
The groom - he's got a weakness
For tuxes with chains for trim.
They aren't the only ones to marry.
The whole town is getting hitched.
We'd share with you the numbers
but the last census--it got ditched.
This group is all excited
to be making such new friends.
There's a special wedding wine
And free reception at Castle M.
There'll be a mighty gun salute
Performed by prestigious ranks.
X-Ville's finest - the 1st D.A.M.U.-
are planning on arriving in tanks.
There really is no preacher
Nor agreed upon religion.
Perhaps they will be married
by a sock puppet of a pigeon.
Neon Mulder must be strong.
He's got a ton of rings to carry.
Hell must be getting pretty icy
to see Paulverizer marry.
Kitty, the saucy barmaid's
Turned saucy maid of honor.
The witness says she's redhead,
We've got no real reason to doubt her.
X-Ville is marrying itself off,
And with only a few exceptions,
The place is mad with love.
We'll see you at the reception!